Faces of AIDS
Testimony and comedy combine to touch the hearts of VWC students
By Joshua Snow, Staff Writer

Upon hearing that he had HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, Joel Goldman did a lot of soul searching before deciding to do something positive with his life and his disease.

“He decided to take it on the road,” joked T.J. Sullivan, Goldman’s partner in the presentation they created specifically for college age students. Since the two began their program they have spoken to over 50,000 students and visited nearly 100 college campuses per year, earning the prestigious Ryan White Award for AIDS education for youth in America.

While on the road, Sullivan and Goldman came to Virginia Wesleyan to present their program, “Friendship in the Face of AIDS”.

Lina Cottingham, director of residence life, sponsored and scheduled the program not long after seeing it herself.

“I saw the program the summer of 1997 in New Brunswick, NJ at the Phi Sigma Sigma convention, as I am a member of Phi Sig. I had seen many presentations like this before but this was different,” said Cottingham.

She went on to say that the duo’s presentation was different because it didn’t buy into stereotypes, it dealt with college situations and was upbeat, but most importantly, it personalizes and puts a face to the disease.

When comparing their program to the plethora of other AIDS education programs in existence, Goldman points out, “We have a much more MTV approach to the whole thing.”

“Our program also looks at the effect alcohol has on the opportunities you encounter in which you can contract the virus. Lots of college students take away the keys from friends when they’re drunk, but not many steer their friends clear from hooking up,” he said.

“Our focus in non-threatening, familiar info. We are not here to depress you or to preach to you,, because we would accomplish nothing by doing that.”

Goldman grew up in the Midwest, the son of a rabbi and a teacher. He conveyed how open a household he lived in when describing the first time he asked his parents about sex.

“I asked my father about sex,” he said. “And being prepared for quite some time for a question like that, he pulled out a five volume encyclopedia on the subject.”

It wasn’t until years later that he would find out how much sex would affect his life. When Goldman arrived at the University of Indiana he found himself leading a double life. He was a serious, involved and responsible student by day, but by night, he drank way too much and ended up having numerous unsafe sexual encounters.

“Alcohol was an ice breaker,” said Goldman. “When I drank I could rationalize just about anything to myself,” he said to a cafeteria full of students.

“It was the mid-eighties and of course I had heard about the new virus out there, but the statistics predicted that only 1 out of 10,000 students would get AIDS,” he said.

It was while attending the University of Indiana that Goldman met Sullivan. It was Sullivan’s freshman year and Goldman’s senior year. They met the first day Sullivan arrived in Indiana.

“I got off the bus and the first person I meet is the leader of the official perky squad or orientation staff,” Sullivan said. “He was the Hoosier from Hell.”

Sullivan went on to talk about how he was especially impressed that Goldman was the president of this fraternity and that some of the first parties he attended while at school were with Goldman, who had invited him.

Eventually Goldman graduated and had to make some decisions concerning the habits he had formed during college.

“I decided to stop drinking,” Goldman said. “And once I stopped drinking I decided to start having protected sex. I also decided to get an AIDS test.”

The test came back negative. Goldman related to the VWC crowd how excited and relieved he was after testing negative for the virus.

Life continued and Goldman got a job working for the main office of his fraternity. His job required a lot of traveling and it seemed that after each trip he became ill. He incorrectly assumed it was the fast pace of the traveling he had been doing that was making him sick.

He finally decided to go to the doctor, who pointed out that all of the symptoms he was suffering from were all classic symptoms of HIV. The doctor administered a second AIDS test, which came back positive.

“I remember walking in for the results and looking at the doctor,” Goldman recalled. “He looked at me and said, ‘You have HIV’ and that is all I heard.”

He couldn’t believe it. Since the last test, he hadn’t had unprotected sex. The doctor then explained the concept of the “window period”.

From the point of infection up to six months, you may have the virus, but it may not show up in tests. Goldman’s first test was taken in this period.

“I remember walking into the lobby thinking that the whole thing was a dream,” he said. And I remember seeing a jar of lollipops sitting on the receptionist’s desk. I knew that I had never tasted anything in a dream and I had to know, so I took a lollipop and put it in my mouth. I could taste it. I’ll never forget the taste of that lollipop. It was cherry.”

After a short period of wallowing in self pity, Goldman decided to tell his loved ones about his disease. He and Sullivan had been friends for 10 years when Goldman called him to tell him the bad news.

When he received Goldman’s call, Sullivan was on his way out with friends. He was so shocked by the news that he didn’t know what to say and simply told Goldman he would talk to him later. He then proceeded to freeze him out.

“I felt stupid, helpless, and I knew I wasn’t being a good friend,” Sullivan recalled. “But more than anything I wondered how Joel could be dying.”

Eventually Sullivan confronted his concerns and fears. He and Goldman began taking time off from jobs they had in Ohio and Colorado respectively, and took Sullivan’s amateur stand-up comedian skills and Goldman’s testimony “on the road”.

After completing their stories, they gave some little known facts about AIDS. For instance, more people have died from AIDS than from the Korean, Vietnam, and Persian Gulf Wars put together. Or that 50% of new AIDS cases occur in people of college age or younger. In closing, Goldman pointed out that AIDS is our generation’s Vietnam crisis. He said, “Next time you see a friend doing something dangerous don’t be afraid to say something.”

“And please be more prepared for your phone call than I was for mine,” said Sullivan, before quietly placing his microphone back into it’s stand and leaving the platform to the thunder of a standing ovation.