Love in the 90s: Getting from here to there
by Nicole O'Bleanis

Relax, take a deep breath and take a long look at dating in the 90s. Free love has been replaced by free condoms, and archaic soda pop shops shiver in the shadows of loud bars and even louder dance clubs. Commercials for the suppression of herpes are casually mixed with ads for Ultress and Depends.

The conservatism of the 50s, the flowerific liberation of the 60s, the discoesque dynamics of the 70s and the stylish trashiness of the 80s have merged and given single twenty-somethings of the 90s a tangled web of a world in which they have to find their one true love.

Ferdinand M. DeLeon, writer for the Seattle Times/Post Intelligencer, put it best when he wrote: “[twenty-somethings were] weaned on warnings about child molesters, raised to beware of unwanted pregnancies and date rapes, [and] brought up fearing AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases.”

Nothing is simple anymore, certainly not dating, but it doesn’t stop eligible persons from searching for the right cream for their coffee.

“I myself am looking for love,” said 20-year-old junior Nancy Allen. “Sometimes I feel pressured to find someone.”

“So many people feel like they have to find their soul mates,” Jami McManama, a senior, said. McManama feels that people should walk around with specific numbers on their hands so that they’ll know who THE one is when they meet just by matching the numerals.
If only it could be that easy.

It takes a lot of courage and education to date in this time and age. More singles are dating in groups or looking for prospective mates through family and friends.

Playing the field “can be dangerous,” McManama said, “especially with the new date rape drug [Rophynol]. Take friends with you.”

It is important to find out each potential partner’s background, especially if a person who is seeing several people at once decides to indulge in a little hanky-panky. Unlike the 60s, casual sex must be met with a condom and a smile. The Archives of Internal Medicine Report found that “40% of HIV-infected people surveyed said that they do not disclose their HIV status to their sex partners.”

Apparently, the rules of the dating world have changed, but the game itself is still the same.

Looks. Livelihood. Lexus or no Lexus. Every little nuance counts when courting. This includes approaching that infamous subject—the double standard.

“Guys like to have relationships, but in society, they’re supposed to play the field,” said junior Christian Uhler, who has been in a steady relationship for almost two years. “If a girl slept with a lot of guys she wasn’t a slut [back in the 60s], but now, if she sleeps with five guys, she is a slut.”

Uhler and junior David McDonald, 22, both like the new women who are becoming more aggressive when on the prowl.

“It’s ruining my hormones,” McDonald joked.

On the lighter side, dating is definitely an experience. Choosing the right restaurant, watching the perfect movie and getting revved up for the “goodnight kiss” all add to the wonderful, puke-inducing thrill that is dating. Although singles of the 90s have to practice much more discretion than the free-wheeling, bottoms-up bohemians of the past, it should not take away from the fun and possible love a good date can bring.

“Why take it seriously,” said Uhler with a grin. “A person will come around in time.”

Kisses that can make or break the moment

1. The Sloppy-Yet-Satisfying Kiss: Who cares if there are dabbles of droll all over your face? It was worth it.

2. The I-Havenknow that God gave ’t-Eaten-In-A-Week-Kiss: Sometimes you just have to let him/her you tonsils for a purpose.

3. The Soap Opera Kiss: It's like salad dressing. . . all ’s like salad without the lips.

4. The One- More-Try-Kiss: It may take your kissing partner a while to find your mouth, but after he/she hits gold, the birds begin to sing.

5. The Car Wreck Kiss: His/her nose ends up in your eye; the kiss winds up everywhere on your face except where it should be. If you’re lucky, you may be able to put the kiss back together without having to call your insurance agent.