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Photo courtesy of PAUL KOLHOFF
Wesleyan security guard Paul Kolhoff with fiancee Mary Doroso |
Born June of 1962 in Newport, R.I., and two years later moving with his family to Norfolk where his father was stationed, Paul Kolhoff entered Princess Anne High School in 1977. After only attending this school for a year, he met his on again, off again girlfriend, Mary. However this loving couple was quickly put to test as Kolhoff went off to the Marine Corps in 1980, not returning to Virginia until four years later. Now one of our very own security guards. Kolhoff has been here without a question of leaving since 1988. He has been through and experienced a lot in his life, but this past month making a huge decision will change his life forever as the engagement to high school sweetheart, Mary Doroso, has been announced.
“I’ve been thinking about asking her on and off, but when the right time came, I knew I had to take the chance,” Kolhoff said. When Kolhoff entered his junior year of high school, he met Doroso. It was not until his senior year and her freshman year at Tidewater Community College that the two began their romance. Their relationship lasted about a year and a half and then in the summer of 1980, after graduating high school, he went off to pursue his life long dream in the military. He entered the Marine Corps and was stationed in a variety of places for four years. However, in 1984, Kolhoff was diagnosed with diabetes, and unfortunately had to resign his position in the Corps.
“The Marines was a dream to me, I always knew that I’d go, and if I wasn’t diagnosed with diabetes I would probably still probably be there,” Kolhoff said. During the time Kolhoff was in the Corps he and Doroso were not involved. He did not keep close contact with her. “I got in trouble with many people for not keeping in touch with them, including my mother,” he said. After his time in the military, Kolhoff returned to the Virginia Beach area, and became reunited with Doroso. At that time she was attending school at Old Dominion University. Kolhoff decided to try college out for a little while and enrolled in community college for a year. His and Doroso’s relationship again had it’s ups and downs eventually ending in 1987, the same year Doroso graduated from ODU and decided to move out west.
Kolhoff went on with his life in Virginia, finished up his year in community college and began looking for jobs. He worked for Cape Henry Towers as a security officer before landing his most recent job at Wesleyan in 1988. “I took the job at Wesleyan because I was honestly looking for a job with benefits, and this one had it!” he said laughing. As years went on Kolhoff had no idea of Doroso’s residence. Was she still in California? Did she come back to Virginia? Or did she move somewhere else? With these questions in his head everyday, his quest continued and nothing would stop him from finding his long lost love.
Kolhoff never gave up on Doroso but there was only so much he could do to find her. His hope was renewed one Saturday night, 8 months ago when his brother came home to tell Kolhoff that he saw Doroso at a bar. Kolhoff made his way out to find her after all these years with the attempt of winning her heart back for a third time. “Last time I saw Mary I didn’t think I treated her so well, so I went to her and felt that the first thing I should do, is ask for forgiveness,” he said. After spending the rest of the night with her at the bar Kolhoff decided to take another chance and ask her if he could have her phone number once again. Doroso gave it to him, and without letting any more obstacles keep them apart, they’re love has been strong ever since. As time went on the two started to rekindle the old feelings and closeness they once had.
Recently, Doroso decided that she wanted to buy a house. This search brought the two to Haygood Point. There, Doroso found a house she really wanted, but just couldn’t afford it on her own. “Right then and there, the words of [Wesleyan head baseball coach,] Nick Booth, came into my head, he always would say, ‘sometimes in the game of life you just need to step up to the plate.’” Kolhoff said to Doroso, “I know you can’t afford this house on your own, but I know that we can do it together.” Living together without being married was not an option for the two, so as Kolhoff and Doroso walked out of the house together he asked her if she realized what this meant, and Doroso gave him a look of approval. Finally, the ratified contract for the house that the two had been waiting for came. “I just got down on my one knee and proposed,” he said happily. With all of Kolhoff’s excitement he went to his good friend and coworker, College Advancement program coordinator, Judi Sands, and told her about his exciting plans.
“I was very happy for Paul when he told me, he’s been a long time bachelor so this is cool,” Sands said. Kolhoff then proceeded with an even better idea. He asked Sands if her boyfriend, Tom Ammons, District Court Judge, could marry them. The closing on the house is Mar. 13 and after that they plan to get everything with the house settled. “In about six or seven months we plan on having a church wedding, and then hopefully children next,” Kolhoff said proudly. The two high school sweethearts, Kolhoff, 40, and Doroso, 41, will say their vows for the first time on Mar. 3, 2003, at 3 p.m. It’s been a long journey but they realize that things happen for a reason and fate was following them through it all. “Mary was my first girlfriend, and first love. I kicked myself in the ass and said if I ever got a second chance with her, I would never let her go, and I’m not.”
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